flailing
The librarian and I had words today. This came after an episode where she shooshed several of us teachers and told us to "stop talking". Let's just say I told her she is disrespectful. She said she was a Christian and disliked no one. (Internal dialogue at that point: 'That's an odd angle to take.') We agreed to respect each other - I, her library rules, and she, that I'm an adult.
A parent asked me to hang out with his daughter on weekends. I thought he meant for tutoring. He meant as a buddy. He asked in front of his kid. Her mother died a few months back. It was impossible to say no. I think we agreed to one Saturday a month. I'm not really sure. He could have been hitting on me for all I know.
"We have this big house and it's just me and her. I'll invite you over sometime."
I came home and flailed from the kitchen to the living room to the tune of "Hounds of Love". There was a time when I knew who that song was by. I did my best air guitar. It was just what I needed.
posted by ladystroll @ 7:30 p.m.
1 Comments:
wow. lijitu - thanks for pointing out the safety factor. i'm generally conscious of my safety but my brain hadn't thought that far. and thanks for sharing your experience. for women who have been raped, there's always too much silence and blame directed at themselves.
i play the boyfriend card all the time here. for example (and dina this may relate to your comment about men in ethiopia), this guy started walking and talking to me so i made it clear i was in ethiopia with my boyfriend. he said, 'oh so if he sees you talking to me, he'll beat you.'
'no no, he'll beat yoooou.'
i've talked to quite a few women who don't want habesha boyfriends because they beat them. but then i've talked to habesha men who claim they know women who think that if they're not beaten, they're not loved. either way, it's sad sad sad.
this girl does have an aunt that has been around for the last few months but i think she's going home now and that's why he's looking for a substitute. the bigger problem i think is that this is a little girl who has been given so much stuff as an attempt to fill the mother void - an obviously messed up plan on the part of the family. and it shows. she is constantly showing off her new things to the other kids.
now i'm worried that if i spend time with her outside of school, she'll claim her teacher as her own; she'll expect favours and not respect rules.
and should she really develop an attachment at this sensitive time to a teacher that is, in a sense, ultimately going to leave her as well? i really believe her father is going about things the wrong way and regardless of his busy schedule, should spend more time with her, no matter the cost to his business. then again, maybe this is a good opportunity to speak with her about her mother and it sounds like i'll be the only one letting her do that.
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